No Job for You!

After months of saying things like, “I just feel thankful to have a job at all,” I  joined the ranks of third world America when I was laid off today. I guess it was bound to happen eventually. It seems to be happening to everyone. I guess I get now why they break the news to people on Fridays. At least I get a long weekend.

My parents got married during a pretty bad recession. Both of them have degrees, and both had trouble finding work for a long time. My dad was laid off from tons of jobs during that time, and he says every time it happened, it turned out to be a good thing, because he ended up somewhere better as a result.

It has not been a secret to us that our company has been struggling over the last year or so. So it was not a total shock for me. I guess the timing was a little shocking because I didn’t realize it had finally come to that. Everyone else is getting pay cuts and hour cuts, but the creative person is always the first to go completely. Art is expendable, you know.

My boss is being pretty cool about it. He’s offered to keep me on contractually part-time, so that will at least contribute to what little I”ll get on unemployment. I could tell he felt bad delivering the news. I still find it hard to understand how he can pay more than I make in a year for just one of his two kids to attend a posh private school and not have any moral issue with that. But I guess when you own the company, you can do whatever you want. Doesn’t make it right. But it does make it possible. And hey, his kids’ overpriced education is way more important than my ability to not be homeless. Apparently. Let’s face it, when you grow up with money, private school versus public school doesn’t make a shit ton of difference. But, I digress.

I guess it’s kind of a good thing. I didn’t want to stay at that job forever, but I have a hard time pushing myself to make big changes. I probably would have had a really hard time quitting unless presented with a miracle dream job doing something philanthropic and making more money. And I really never saw myself staying in this city indefinitely either.

Now I feel a certain sense of freedom that I can go somewhere new and start over. Although I have no savings with which to do that. But maybe within the next few months I’ll be able to save some by cutting expenses. At least I won’t be using as much gas. Ha.

I feel fortunate that I don’t have a spouse and/or children tying me to the area. When I answered the question on the unemployment application of, “Are you willing to relocate?” I just thought, “Willing? YES, PLEASE!” I’d like to move to a bigger city. For years I’ve struggled with the simultaneous desire to live in the country and to live in a huge, bustling metropolis. Lately the need to be around more open-minded individuals and diversity has led me to choose the latter. It’s boring meeting the same person over and over again in a different costume. I like people who are weirdos and freaks and different and unique and individual. Usually you can find more people who fit that bill in big cities.

So thus begins my quest for “the next step.” I’m glad when things happen in my life that propel me to move forward. Sometimes you need a push. Or a swift kick in the ass, as the case may be. FORWARD!

Pet Peeves of the Day

Illegible captchas. Seriously, WHAT is the point of human verification methods that real humans cannot decipher???

The word “caveat.” I don’t know why I don’t like it. I think it’s overused, and people generally use it only to make themselves sound smart.

People who make frustrated noises from another room loud enough for you to hear because they want you to say something. If you need to vent, just tell me. I don’t mind listening. But don’t be all passive aggressive and make me ask.

Receiving the same email announcement multiple times in one day. I saw it the first time!

When my boss forwards me email announcements even though I’ve told him multiple times I get those too.

People who continually misspell my name even though they see it in their email inbox multiple times a day.

People who have joint Facebook accounts with their spouse or partner. You are not ONE PERSON!

The neighborhood hooligans who insist on leaving their fast food wrappers in the ditch by my mailbox all the time.

Verizon’s new policy of charging $2.00 per 411 call. Do you think I’d use that service in the first place if I had any other option?

The fact that in order to ship something to Switzerland it costs me less than $3.00, but God forbid I want a tracking number to make sure the second shipment doesn’t get lost/stolen like the first one, it’s $30.00.

The fact that my 10-year clean driving record counts for absolutely nothing the one time I roll through a stop sign because I think I might be late for work, with no other cars in sight and the fear of what might happen if I no longer have a job to be late for. Because one day out of thousands I forget to push the button on my alarm clock over to the “set” position.

As Jenny remarked recently, the phrase, “point person.” Stupid professional lingo. Similarly hated is “price point.” As if the word “price” does not suffice.

The fact that Facebook doesn’t separate my “likes” from my “friends.” I am not friends with flip flops. I like them, but I don’t want them on my friend list.

People who email me with supposedly crucial issues and then fail to get back to me for weeks.

The fact that my boss finds it simpler to have me waste 45 minutes at the Post Office trying to ship a package to his sister in England, when he could have just ordered her kids some clothes online and had it shipped directly, probably at a lower “PRICE POINT.” Note to self: don’t try to save yourself time by filling out a customs form in advance. Invariably, whichever one you choose will be wrong. Even if it was right the last time.

Thank you, and good night.

Books: Cemetery Dance

What a disappointment. First book in YEARS I have started and not finished. That very act is typically against all that I stand for as a reader. But I got three-quarters of the way through and realized I didn’t care about what happened to the characters or what the plot resolution was going to be. Better luck next time, Preston & Child! Zero stars. And I usually love their books. Maybe I really am getting ADD in my old age…